Spam Spam Spam

I decided to run a little experiment this week. On Thursday morning, after logging into my primary email account and replying to last nights messages, I cleared my BULK folder. For non-Yahoo users, the BULK folder is where unwanted emails are filtered to, before being deleted. Unwanted emails are more commonly known as SPAM.

Anyway, it's been five days without manually emptying my Bulk folder and I currently have 554 emails in that folder. It doesn't take genius to figure out that I am getting over 100 unwanted emails a DAY. Most of them are, naturally, sexual in nature. Some mortgage offers, debt consolidation, games, and RAZOR cell phones, but mostly sex.

Chicks masturbating on their webcams, well yes, I can see why I am being sent those offers. Milfs? Strippers? Hot Asians? OK, I can imagine why they are sending that sort of material to me.

What I can't understand is where the folks who produce animal porn, fat chick porn, she male porn, and cartoon porn keep getting my address!!! And really, how effective is this sort of marketing in this day and age? Between search engines, blogs, message boards, MySpace and file sharing programs, how many people actually follow up on offers they get via spammed email?

If I wanted to find porn to satisfy my kinks, I can find whatever I want in a few keystrokes. And even if I was following up on the offers coming into my Inbox, I get over 100 a day! I wouldn't have the time to follow-up on them, even if wanted to!!!

And just so you know, while I wrote this piece, I got two more spam emails.

Voice of Tony the Tiger, Dies

Thurl Ravenscroft, Known as the Voice of Tony the Tiger, Dies
Tuesday, May 24, 2005

FULLERTON, Calif. — Thurl Ravenscroft, who provided the rumbling "They're Grrrrreeeat!" for Kellogg's Tony the Tiger ads and voiced a host of Disney characters, has died. He was 91.

Ravenscroft died Sunday of prostate cancer, said Diane Challis Davy, director of Laguna Beach's Pageant of the Masters.

Separated at Birth???

Phil Spector in court on Monday.

Hair Bear and the rest of the gang from the Wonderland Zoo.


UPDATED:

Anyone catch E!'s "The Soup" this weekend? They used this joke and used the SAME picture as I did. I only mention it cause some little man on filter site got pissed that I "self linked" this post to the site. I apologized for breaking the rules, but would not back down on the fact it was original and funny. It was nice to be vindicated by seeing a joke I came up with a last week show up on TV this weekend. Now, I'm not saying "The Soup" ripped me off. I'm just saying the joke we both came up with was TV worthy.

Pete & Pete on DVD!!!

# DVD Release Date: May 17, 2005
# DVD Features:

* Available Audio Tracks: English (Dolby Digital 2.0 Stereo)
* Foud bonus Pete & Pete Specials:
* "Valentine's Day Massacre"
* "What We Did On Our Summer Vacation"
* "Apocalypse Pete"
* "New Year's Pete"
* Pete & Pete Shorts: "The Burping Room" & "Mom's Plate"
* Audio Commentaries with the director and co-creators

Buy It Now!!!

If you don't know the show, I can't help you. If you do know it, you are psyched.

Love it or Hate it?

I haven't decided yet.

"Various electronic artists from net based music label Hippocamp.net
“celebrate the anniversary of the release” of The Beach Boys’ Pet
Sounds album by ripping, mixing, and burning it into
something ...different."

An overdub mash of Napoleon Dynamite dialogue unto ye olde Fat Albert
cartoons.

http://www.heavy.com/viral2/fatdynamite/

The Big Lebowski as performed by He-Man and the Masters Of The
Universe:

http://www.heavy.com/viral2/big_hebowski/

I have a video tape (how old fashioned!) of Apocolypse Now dialogue
over Winne the Pooh cartoons that's pretty damn hysterical. I really need to digitize it one of these days.

Still Bored?

Nina Gordon from Veruca Salt covers Straight Outta Compton

Wasn't this a Dead Milkmen song?

Hooked is a 1966 comic distributed to NYC methadone clinics. A fine plan, mythologizing heroin use to recovering addicts.

Methadone Comic Book

Do you have a boner?

how about now?

Talking smack about Batman

It seems that the rest of the Super Friends like to dis Batman behind his back.
Still, better than the movie with Arnold as the gay refrigerator.

Blink O Rama

Celebs caught blinking on camera:

http://blinkorama.blogspot.com/

My fave is February 22, 2005, Joan Rivers.

Star Wars coloring book

Well, to be correct it's the Unintentionally Sexual Star Wars Coloring Book

Who is...The Cat?

From the producers of The Mole comes a new sensation in reality
television. Can you figure out: Who is...The Cat?

You name it...

...and I'll throw a rock at it.

'Captain Jean Luc Picard - of the USS Enterprise'

The dancing Dr. Crusher, in the bikini
(with camel toe) is what makes it for me.

Dept. Of Unnecessary Covers 2

Jennifer Love Hewitt butchers Billy Idol for the Oxygen Original
Movie "Confessions of a Sociopathic Social Climber".

Dancing With Myself

This goes into the same folder as Mandy Moore covering XTC and the
Duff sisters doing "Our Lips Are Sealed".

Dept. Of Unnecessary Covers

Jesse's Girl by some band named "Frickin' A", which is made up
entirely of guys who look like the dude from Sugar Ray.

http://www.frickina.com/video/FrickinJessie.wmv

And yes, that's Rick Springfield in the video.

Wreckless Me

Best line from when I saw Wreckless Eric a few months back:

He was apologizing for all the bad music that came out of England in
the 80s and people were shouting out names of groups and he was
letting off zingers about them. Then someone shouted out "STING", to
which he replied:

"Oh Sting, where is thy death?"

Genius.

Holy Boner, Batman!

They laugh at my boner, will they? I'll show them how many boners the Joker can make!!!

SPIDER-MAN'S GREATEST BIBLE STORIES!

Fecking genius